Some Spiritual Musings

It's the middle of the night I keep tossing and turning in bed with a lot on my mind. This last month has been difficult but I've grown a lot spiritually.

I  had a good friend die unexpectedly (as Heidi posted earlier) but I also had one get sealed in the temple on that same day. The friend that got sealed was around my age and I had known him for years. When I witnessed the sealing and saw his bride sobbing at the pure joy of having the sealing covenant in her life (it was really cute because at the end of the ceremony, she said, "Yay!" through her tears), I thought, "I wish I had understood and appreciated the covenant to that same degree when I got married."

As I mentioned though, it's been hard because I've had people I love
• go through divorce,
• suffer poor health,
• agonize over wayward children,
• mourn the loss of loved ones, and
• regret the mistakes of the past.
I've felt helpless and inadequate as I've seen them go through pain. I've prayed for them, put names on the prayer roll of the temple, but have mostly wondered what I should do.

As I was driving home from work today, I re-listened to Elder Cook's talk from last General Conference. He said that he loved it when Elder Maxwell quote Anne Morrow Lindbergh. The quote described perfectly how I felt.

My life cannot implement in action the demands of all the people to whom my heart responds.

So to all my friends who are in mourning and are experiencing difficulty, I send my awkward, yet humble love and prayers.  Please know that I am thinking of you and praying for you, even if my feeble attempts to comfort are of little help.

This last little while has also been good for me spiritually as I've had multiple opportunities to teach. I love teaching. It helps me focus my scripture study and think of how topics apply in my life. I feel somewhat selfish in that  I think it might help me more than anyone that hears, but in the last week I was able to prepare a talk on morality for Sacrament Meeting, prepare a lesson on Peer Pressure for  the Mutual combined activity and this next Sunday I get to do sharing time in Primary (I love being with the Primary children!)

The sacrament talk was a last minute thing. This last Saturday, the sister who was going to speak had a fever from the swine flu and would be still be contagious on Sunday. I told her not to worry about her speaking assignment, and I spent that day thinking about the topic as I helped tear down a chicken coop, put in a new mailbox and assisted a colleague who had retired with some computer problems.

I had thought that I would just try to speak from my heart with just some note cards because I didn't get done with all my chores until 8:00 pm. I know the Lord promises that he will help in the very hour with what needs to be said, but I lacked faith. I wish I could be eloquent and preach the word of the Lord extemporaneously, but I still feel nervous when I have to speak and I was worried I'd lack clarity and cohesion. So, I wrote it out. I posted it below if you get really bored and want something to read.

But writing the talk out was really helpful to me as this whole week I've been rereading it and thinking about morality and my sweet, eternal companion.

I feel like my love for Heidi has grown exponentially.

I don't know what I ever did to deserve someone like her, but I'm eternally grateful that she agreed to marry me. (Well, technically, she did ask me to marry her, but that's because she beat me to the punch ;-)). When I think of how I was then with how I am now, she pretty much was looking at a lump of coal and if I'm anything more than coal now, it's because she's inspired me to be a better person.

Well I should probably try to fall asleep again. I just want to share with the friends and family that read this that I love you guys and my life is better because of you.

Morality Talk

Wordless Wednesday

Halloween ramblings

Things went a little differently this Halloween.

Usually the kids have decided long in advance what they want to be, but this year only Camille knew what she wanted her costume to be. I've never put pressure on them to have a theme, mainly because I like seeing what they'll come up with. Yes, I have pushed a few, failed ideas for costumes but was ultimately rejected. Last year, I really wanted Hannah to be a lobster. We have some of the silicon oven mits that are red. I mean, how perfect! And who better to pull it off than Hannah? I even had the whole costume imagined in my head. It was going to be AWESOME! Instead, she wanted to be the Krispy Kreme doughnut man. She won and was adorable.

So this year Camille told me that she wanted to be a Garden Gnome. Think "Travelocity". She had ideas of how she wanted to look, so Troy and I went to the fabric store to buy the goods. While I was getting fabric cut, the employee says to me, "Oh! Looks like we're making a Santa costume!?" I told her that we weren't. Instead it was a Garden Gnome...for my daughter. She then said, "Wow. I've never heard of anyone being a Garden Gnome, let alone a girl." Yeah, well, you haven't met Camille aka Chameleon Jones (a nickname given to her by her Uncle Justin)

Her beard got a little weird by night's end (we opted to not have some long flowing thing), but she rocked the costume and even won a little contest at a Halloween party.

Cam was the next costume. I told him last year that when he turned 12 he was in charge of his own costume. I didn't really want him to trick-or-treat, but he could if he wanted to.

Cam is known for his VERY interesting costumes. We've had a lot of fun dreaming them up. It started with his Rodeo Clown (for which he is now available for download in royalty free stock photography), then progressed to his guy taking a bath costume, chicken and the egg costume and finally, last year, the giant eyeball.

But this year had to be something he could pull off with VERY minimal effort from mom. He chose to be a ceiling fan. Very clever and very CAM. We made a sign, did an iron-on transfer to a white T-shirt, and had him wear the soda can holder hat. Here he is...

Troy and Hannah opted to wear old costumes that I had made a couple of years ago. Troy makes a pretty good vampire (I'm still waiting for him to put Buddy the Elf back on) and Hannah is just a cute little witch. I was a little relieved not to have to make their costumes since I had helped with a funeral the week before and then was struck by the strep throat bug the week of Halloween.

Finally, the girls begged me to buy the dog a hot dog costume. I think she looks silly. Besides, Hannah and Camille are constantly dressing her up in other outfits that they design here at home. Some other considerations for Cookie were Rockstar, Bumblebee, or Ballerina.

And what was my costume? I think I went as a "Costume Designer"

Jump start

Maybe I can actually start to post on this blog again. It's been so long that I'm almost embarrassed, but not embarrassed enough to not do it.

There were events during the last week and a half that have truly strengthened my testimony. Namely the death of our dear, dear friend Naki Maile and the memorial events and funeral that followed. Naki was a close friend to Troy...kind of his go-to guy when he needed help with some Priesthood duties. Especially the late night-Naki won't mind me calling this late-ones. Naki has also been our home teacher for the past few years. We have loved him coming to our house, sharing his extreme love of the Gospel, catching us up on the inside workings of BYU football (he played for the Y), and loving and enjoying our kids. We will miss him so much. He left his true love, Abby, and their six darling daughters. He was a rock in our ward and his legacy will continue to support many in our ward during difficult times.

I'm in the Relief Society Presidency now (Troy is still the 1st coun. in the bishopbric) so I had the opportunity to help out some during the last week. It was something amazing to see the love that people had for Naki and for Abby and the girls. So many times it brought me to tears. A couple of days before the funeral, Cameron came to me and said that he really wanted to go. I hesitated for a minute (because junior high makeup work isn't as easy as elementary school), but then scolded myself and told him that I really wanted him to be there. I told Cam that because I was helping do some things before the funeral I would need him to come with me early in the morning in order to open the Stake Center for the mortuary, etc. Just be our little run around guy until more people showed up. I spoke with Troy about it and a few minutes later Troy came up to me and said that he thought Cameron should go too. He told me that Naki would have liked to have had his last home teaching lesson be one of service. Needless to say, tears flowed. I think I'm almost as bad as Troy in the tear department. I think it was President Faust that said that tears were a gift of the spirit, so I need to really start embracing it.

If you'd like to read Abby's blog, here's the address: sixmailechix.blogspot.com

It also seems funny to me that I feel like posting right now. On Monday afternoon I started sneezing and just not feeling very good. Tuesday was even worse. I stayed home and eventually just climbed into bed with chills and a fever. Yeah, my first thought was, I have the Swine Flu. This thought was intensified by the 102-103 fever that I was presenting. Thank goodness for acetameniphine ( I can't spell it and I'm not going to look it up). I broke the fever and I was feeling better, except I had a raging sore throat. I got the appointment for this morning and lo and behold, NO swine flu, just strep throat. That may not sound like a good trade off to many of you, but I was happy. Happy to have one shot and be on my way (no pills 4x a day). Happy to only be contagious until about noon tomorrow. Happy that while Troy and I were waiting a shipment of the Flu vaccine arrived at the office and we both got it (OK, so technically I got 2 shots). Happy for an unexpected tender mercy to come my way. Happy that because of this tender mercy I wanted to post again.

Ketchup (I seem to need to do this a lot)

Boy have I got a lot to write about.  We've set some summer goals, and journaling is one of them.  I have my own personal one, but I'd like to write more here so that I can eventually print it into book format.

I have been lazy only posting "Wordless Wednesday" and have totally ignored over aspects of our continuos party.  So without further delay, I present (in no particular order) a bunch of posts about what we've been up to.

Science Fair

Yep, this happened a long time ago.  But, to make a short story even shorter, Cam the Man won the Windsor School Science Fair, then when on to win the Alpine School District Science Fair, and then rocked it again and placed 3rd in the Utah Engineering and Science Fair.  He had to to the last (and biggest) fair without his partner and was awarded a cash prize.  He was a trooper and did such a great job.  This kid rocks and I love him to death.  

Hope of America

This year, each of the kids had the chance to participate in the Hope of American Student Showcase.  It's a BIG patriotic celebration at BYU's Marriott Center.  In the past, ere have been over 7,000 children participating at one time. The event is so big that they've divided the school districts up and made it more manageable (as in, being able to find your children after the event is over) for the parents.  Cam and Hannah are up in the blue section (Cam was actually a star) and Camille was an Indian in a number down on the floor.  Cute kids...glad it's only once a year.  

Sorry about the picture.  I took it with my phone.

Camping

Now that we've got a Boy Scout, it's time to get this monster under control.  Cam has enough Merit Badges to already be a Star in rank (the kid cranks them out).  But one of the requirements is to get 20 days/nights of camping.  He has required ones that he has to do with the Scouts, but now it's time to kick it into gear with the family.  The kids were so excited to go that they slept in either the Truck Tent or one of the other tents for three nights before we left!

So, on the Friday of Memorial Day Weekend, we headed to Burraston Ponds, about 40 miles south of our beloved home.

It was great!  Troy is totally into it (he even bought a new tent TODAY).  I'm telling you, if you are going camping and are worried about food, i.e. eating hotdogs, etc., then come with us!  We had some killer food!  Troy is becoming Master of Camp Cooking.  It's great!

This camping trip had two great quotes.  First Cam's (making a matter-of-fact statement to Troy and I) "Either I saw one really large dog or a small bear."  What he actually saw was a cow across the pond.

The other quote came from Camille..."Mom, if I forget to flush the toilet when we get home it's because I have used these Porta-Potties so much".  

Here's the Truck Tent.  It's awesome and it's where the parents sleep! If you've got a truck without a shell get one.

Here's my "Good Morning" camp face.

Here are a couple of views from our camping spot.  It was a beautiful place!

The kids had a great time exploring, playing in the water, and just acting silly.

 

Wordless Wednesday

Some good words on Wednesday